Being knocked down and then getting back up does NOT get enough praise.
There can be days where it seems like we are just down…unable to get up because the negatives coming at us are just too much. Yet you do get up.
There is no brass band when you get back up. In fact, I would venture to say, that you don’t give yourself any credit for getting up and getting back to what is needed and expected.
“Natalie, I have to get back up, I have no choice”.
And there you go. If you cannot take a compliment, then you can stop reading right now.
I mean it. If you cannot hear anything positive about yourself, you can stop reading now.
The fact that you get back up speaks to the terrific person you are. The courage you have. The contribution that swirls around in your body. The value that you bring. The issues that you solve……
The solvable issue that I see in every one of my clients and in my audiences is that they do not believe they are a terrific person with lots of courage.
If they were, wouldn’t the following be the case?
- I would make more money right now
- Have the best relationship of my life
- Kids and family would be perfectly healthy
- My knees would stop bothering me while I exercise
- The corporate team mates would be better at creating successful outcomes
Knowing what you want and then going for it should have a brass band connected with it. Each and every time we display a “value” that is important to us, a wildly happy alarm should go off with a big arrow pointing to us.
You might think “I don’t need any credit for doing some well or good”.
Oh yes you do. Not only do you need it, you deserve it. So if you cannot acknowledge that you are contributing even when things are hard, how can the “world” congratulate you. You would not take the compliment. You would be suspect of the motives. You would wait for the other shoe to drop KNOWING it was going to be negative.
All good things are good. No matter how little or big. You do good things for yourself, your family, your organization, your church, your community and think about it as “having” to do that rather than congratulating yourself for doing a good thing, cause it is good to do and that is who you are.
Here comes the compliment. Deep breath. No ducking or deflecting.
Every time you get up from being hurt or knocked down, you are doing good. And you are doing good – in the space of being hurt and unappreciated because you are a good person. You have courage. You are terrific. The only reason you may not think that is because you have allowed the big ugly negative world tell you otherwise.
Rumi, the 12th Century poet wrote:
“close your eyes, feel love, stay there”
Today I get the privilege of being your “terrific person” reminder. Do know that not too far under that negative reaction of yours, is a very sweet and loving person waiting to be acknowledged.
When I debrief the assessment that I use for leadership, communication and behavior excellence, there is a portion that talks about how you would like to be communicated with by all the people in your world.
Most of the respondents say they would like to be treated with respect, shown interest in their topic, listened to and complimented or commented on.
I think that sounds like a reasonable request and a sound way to communicate.
So, if that is what you want, is that what you are providing to others?
No matter how many times you get knocked down, if you bring to your world and provide to others what you want, you will begin to create a better environment and you will get to know that terrific courage filled person…YOU.
Compliments over, you can breathe now. 🙂
Be well, stress-less and know that you are a blessing,
P.S. The assessment I mentioned above is a great snapshot of who you are and how you are operating in your world today. Ask me about it.
Thanks for this very timely message, Natalie. This morning, as I listened to yet another newscast about how depression dogged Robin Williams, all I could think of was the multitude of people who were saying to themselves “if he couldn’t beat depression with all that he had going for him, what chance do I have?” I wish I could put this blog up on a huge billboard with blinking lights to remind people of their worth!
Leslie, thank you for your note and thoughts. When I heard that he had killed himself, I let out a huge sigh and a noooooooo. It is so important that we remind ourselves and others many many times. Blessings and love to you.
Thank you for a great post! It was perfect timing for me to read this, use it in my own life and to be mindful of those precious family members, friends and co-workers whom I can encourage and give credit when we demonstrate the courage to get back up!
Nada, thank you so much for your note and gracious comments. Your friends and co-workers are so very fortunate to have you in their lives. Be blessed.