Do you even know how terrific you are? Have you allowed in any moments so you could know how remarkable you are? Filled with courage and moving toward overcoming self-doubt?
Most of our standards of how we should be or operate are made up from long ago learned mindsets and beliefs. Stories that are currently not helpful and damaging to our self-esteem.
From our ago zero to about 7 years old, our brain is a sponge. We learn all we need to “survive” from the world around us. How our family communicates; feeds us; cares for us; who these people are and how they treat each other; what their rituals are…
We learn that “this” is the way life is and we believe it because if we hope to survive and be safe, we have to acclimate to our surroundings. When we examine those situations and stories now, we judge them and ourselves for how “stupid” it was and is to believe that is the way life should be.
My clients have told me horrendous stories of dinner time and how they needed to act or speak or they did not get fed. Who they could play with and who was not allowed in their house. How schoolwork was to be done. The silence they had to keep during “dad’s” reading time of the evening paper. Never ever showing up late for anything because there would be a whipping. Why there was so much shouting and hitting.
There is a story of a royal prince that did not get to eat all his dinner for two years because his nanny wanted to see if anyone noticed.
How about the kids that had to scour the garbage to help fed their families?
Our behavior and realization of the world came from experiences of our childhood. If you were hungry, scared and unsafe, you built a mindset that life is not safe and a belief that safety was hard…or maybe you did not even deserve it.
That is why I ask you today “what are you doing right?”
What is right for you? Can you compliment yourself for getting out of bed today even though you are tired and hungry for recognition.
There are simple activities and hard activities. Not all of us experience them the same way.
The fact that you are participating and getting up and continually trying is “doing something really right”.
So little attention or recognition is given to the adults we have become and the struggles we have overcome. People expect us to have learned what is needed to be a hardworking, successful adult…everyday, every hour, every year.
Well, I am here to tell you and I am extremely proud of you for doing for you what is hard, no matter how simple it is.
There is great love in the place where we feel successful and safe. Even the most accomplished among you have places that feel like they have a gigantic hole that you must keep secret from others. What would “they” think if they knew you had areas that were not as perfect as expected.
I just finished a wonderful VIP weekend with a remarkable woman who was able to “see what she is doing right” in full color. When you allow yourself a moment of “what are you doing right”, you will find an extraordinary human. Just the fact that you are willing to look at who you are right now will flush out that terrific you hiding behind the judgments of how this really ought to be perfect by now.
OK. If your standard is perfect, I wish you luck. But if your standard for your life is terrific, welcome to the promise that you will continue to learn, do, be, love and “do what is right” for you and your life.
A huge hooray for the terrific you.
To Your Success,
P.S. Would love to do a VIP with you this month or November and help you uncover your remarkable you. How would having an action plan and next steps defined, fully supported and clear, feel for you???? Click here.
P.P.S. There was an old video on YouTube of me doing a presentation in 2007. I never thought the presentation was that good. I decided to watch it – 34 minutes – and I was touched with how resonate the message was and is. (and how good is actually was) I am having one of my staff transcribe it for me so I can have those ideas and words that I built on in the last 12 years. Judging yourself negatively (and with an old story) does NOT allow your remarkable self to show up easily.